Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Independence...the Good, the Bad and the Ugly

Independence.  Such a great word.  We cherish our independence as a country and as citizens to have the freedom to do as we like.

The growing independence of a 2 1/2 year old is not as cherishable sometimes.  There can be good moments of independence, such as wanting to wash herself at bathtime.  Cute, right?  Sure.  Another cute one, wanting to close the gate upon entering the den...cute?  Sure.  Helping to put her toys away...cute.  Even pulling her pants down and going to the bathroom by herself, now without her Dora potty seat, is really cute. 

What's not so cute is the tantrums and fits that come from Mommy still having to do some things for her.  I can't leave the house with my keys.  Cheyenne has to have the keys and walks out to the car and unlocks the door and opens it by herself.  Sure, it's a little slower, but really, I need to pick my battles and that doesn't hurt anyone, so why not?  Well, when we are in a hurry and already late to a playdate, that's why not.  But God forbid I take the keys from her in an attempt to move things along and get us there a few minutes faster.  Not to mention, she doesn't like being put in the car anymore.  She wants to climb into the car and even into her carseat now...all by herself. 

Fixing her meals is another on-again-off-again battle.  Sometimes she is cool with letting me fix her meals, but if the microwave is involved, then she has to push the buttons and start the microwave, and if I don't let her...there is a total meltdown in the middle of the kitchen floor.  She will stand in the open door of the refrigerator or freezer looking around and tapping her finger to her mouth as if she is deep in thought about what she wants to eat.  Let me tell you, on a cold winter morning, the fridge and freezer being open is not the best feeling.  But again, I better not make an attempt to close it or another fit ensues on the kitchen floor. 

Let me tell you, this is one strong willed little girl.  She can be cute as a button and sweet as can be one minute, like this morning, when her pajama pants were inside out after going potty and she asked me for help and when I fixed them, she said "Thank you.  You so nice Mommy!"  Then the next minute can be a total meltdown or screaming fit because I didn't let her close the gate into the den.  I have started implementing time out and when she starts "growling" as I call it or screaming because she doesn't get her way, she goes and sits in time out to learn that this behavior is not acceptable.  I tell you, I'm going to have my hands full with this one....

The independence of a 2 1/2 year old...so sweet, yet so stressful. 

2 comments:

  1. I hate to be the one to tell you that 2.5 is nothing. 3.5 is where it really gets bad! But a wise friend of mine told me a few months ago when I was in the throes of picking 3.5 year old battles: "Is this the hill I want to die on?" It really helped put things into perspective.

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  2. I agree! Skylar was an awesome 2 yr old, a little harder at 2.5 and then 3.5 years hit and "Bam!" she's fighting for her independence with a vengeance! she wants it her way or no way! I've tried the giving 2 choices and it works 75% of the time the other time is spent in time out:( i pick my battles too and she is also so...sweet n loveable n kind to her friends so i know this is just a stage we have to go thru and it too shall pass! I still give her boundaries and consequences for unacceptable behavior and keep it consistent. Hang in there! the best is yet to come LOL!

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